(this is a part of a larger piece of writing - 'Knowledge' refers to a practice of Inner Work)
When I received 'Knowledge', it was about reuniting with my inner freedom - The boundless 'Self'. I wanted to re-connect with 'The Source' I felt I no longer had direct access to. I also wanted to unite and connect with others on a similar path towards recognising unity and wholeness within each other and every thing. I hadn't considered that this 'Knowledge' was an experience without a spoken 'language'. It couldn't be directly communicated with words to anyone else - The 'sharing' of this could only be done via an unique expression of this individual experience.
I needed a LANGUAGE and I was now in a conundrum! I wanted to talk about this experience. I wanted to express it! To begin with there was a traditional outlet referred to as 'satsang' but this word was a part of a particular 'way' and my teacher wanted to strip away ALL other languages and ideas so we could explore and find our OWN.
The problem with finding ones own language, is that it's necessary to be able to teach it to others in order to use and to share it. To teach it to others there has to be a basis, a fundamental experience, an understanding - Green can only be expressed as green if youve seen green! The 'tools' which enabled me to come to my personal experience were strictly secret. Another cunundrum!
Since this reawakening I have been trying to find an outlet, an expression which will do this experience, justice - Nothing quite comes up to scratch . . . . . . . except perhaps . . . Silence, Being, Listening and expressing through art or poetry. These qualities by their very nature are individual and by their nature their experience of 'Source' can never truly be replicated.
I am intrigued by words and sharing Ideas just can't be a part of this Expression without a 'language'. Words are a new way for me, and I am challenged by them. They seem to be the epitome of the Polarity we experience in this world. Words form the very foundation of both clarity and confusion - peace and war - understanding and misunderstanding, so on and so on . . .
Finding my own language has been a great adventure. A call to share and stand up for what is true and joyous, and great, in this life, for me. Recognising that all Seers, seekers, writers, poets and philosophers who established the languages we can refer to today began with their own personal expression of their own unique experience.
If we listened to our inner voices and less to those outside of our 'selves' we would learn what is really true for us in this moment - right now! and be able to share that through spontaneous expression as it occurs to us. Valid and true.
This is PURE INSPIRATION with unique expression - un judged, un edited, downloaded directly from our own 'Selves' which is that part still directly connected to the whole, to the oneness – to Source - The trough from which we all feed, get Inspiration and the Courage to express.
FINDING OUR OWN LANGUAGE and giving ourselves permission to share it, in whatever form it takes is, for me, the greatest challenge in SELF RESPECT. Self respect means respect for the WHOLE, as the true, larger 'self' cannot be seperated, but it can be expressed uniquely by each and every one of us as 'in-divi-duals' - I LOVE WORDS! just look at this:
INDIVIDUALS:
IN = (within) DIVI = (divinity) DUALS = (There's You & Me - we can share this!) We can share our Inner Divinity because we were created IN-DIVI-DUALS
or - undivided-duals - (polarity at its best!)
We are not alone = we are All-One.